When we go into organisations and groups to help them learn about Host Leadership, we talk about our four positions for a host leader. These first appeared in the Host book by Mark McKergow and Helen Bailey.  Briefly, they are: 

• In The Spotlight – upfront, public, talking to everyone, giving a speech or address 
• With The Guests – still in public, talking to people one-on-one or in very small groups
• In The Gallery – stepping back to take an overview of how everything is going and what might need to happen next 
• In The Kitchen – a private space, where you can go behind-the-scenes and reflect, learn and recharge 

There is great value in taking all these positions from time to time. They all offer something different in terms of what you can discover and how you can interact with your people, your ‘guests’. What we hear again and again from real-life leaders and hosts is along the lines of…

• “I would love to take time in the kitchen, but I’m just too busy!”
• “There is always so much to be done, and I want to get time with the people out there”
• “I try to find Kitchen time, but it gets pushed to the end of the day when I am too tired to really use it well”

We can sympathise with this – there is indeed always a lot to be done. And – it’s possible both to find effective ways to build in Kitchen time and use it well. 

Time in the Kitchen is time with the pressure off for a few moments. It’s time for: 

• reflection, 
• learning, 
• talking to key advisors/mentors, 
• sounding new ideas with colleagues
• getting coaching
• developing yourself  

The secret of getting the time for all this is – basically – to SCHEDULE it. Get it into your calendar and protect it. Value it so you don’t just take another meeting over the top of it. One good way to do this is to set aside a time (perhaps the same time) each week. An hour in the kitchen. It can take a few weeks to really get into the swing of this so you’ll very likely have to persist. 

As well as just scheduling your kitchen time, you can also effectively make the time yours by also including others. So for example you could: 

• Make time with a coach or mentor – and put it in the diary
• Keep a regular learning journal – say at the start and end of each week?
• Organise away days or retreats for your closest team
• Join a mastermind group, action learning set, supervision group or similar to meet and draw on ideas from others
• Use mindfulness methods to create brief respites from the busyness of the day. 

It’s interesting to note that the word ‘busyness’ is so similar to business… 

Whichever way you do it, taking time every week In The Kitchen, away from the daily hubbub, will help you be a better leader and a better host.  Which way will you try next week? 

You can download a free 2-page pdf about all the four positions from this website to use and distribute in your team or organisation.